Facebook and Younger Users

Many people have asked me why I don't friend kids under the age of 13 on my facebook. I actually even lost a "friend" due to the fact that I wouldn't friend her son.

Here's my philosophy:

Because I'm a teacher, I'm an example. I also need to stay above the fray and avoid the appearance of impropriety on all accounts when dealing with children. Facebook actually has a policy that no children under 13 are allowed to have accounts. And in order to create one, a child must be dishonest about their age in order to do so. I don't know if they have changed it to accomodate parent permission, but I don't think so.

Facebook, while an amazing way to connect with others, makes me nervous when children are on it. There are just way to many ways for a child to get taken advantage of and hurt--whether by online bullying, inappropriate search material, or child predators. Originally, Facebook was for college students to connect with one another, but has ballooned out very similarly to MySpace (from which I deleted my account because I was disgusted with it, but that's a whole other blog).

I also believe that my students have no business being in my personal business and see how and what I communicate to my friends. My personal life and my professional life are very separate, minus being friends with some of my colleagues. But they are adults. I believe friending students is an accident waiting to happen. If anything were to happen, or if I were to be falsely accused of whatever (there are crazy parents out there), I want to make sure that if my facebook is checked I will be squeakly clean, with no connections whatsoever with online social networking of children who are under the age of 13.

Former students, who are OVER the age of 13, I don't have a problem with. I am not their teacher anymore, and they are old enough according to the rules. My children are going to be complaining all the time, because they will not be allowed to have a phone or do any social networking until they can drive. And even then it will be with restrictions. People do not realize the dangers their children face by connecting to the internet, and many times without direct supervision. I was an incredibly obedient kid growing up, but I still found porn on the internet--and hid it from my parents for a very long time before they figured it out. And that was at the tender age of 14.

In short, I believe it is better to err on the side of caution rather than make a regrettable online mistake by having a student or a younger child read about your personal life as an adult. I'm not saying I'm doing anything I'm ashamed of as a Christian, but there are things that adults discuss, etc. that children have no business knowing.

All that to say if I don't friend a kid, I give them an email address so that they can keep in touch with me in a controlled, safe environment. I strongly promote the safety of children online, and I believe facebook can compromise a child's safety.